I’m pretty sure you are surprised I even know any swear words.

So, I’m just your average girl who binge-watches series at night and complains about dark-circles in the morning. I’m the girl who takes HOURS in the shower but spends barely 15 minutes actually bathing. I’m the girl who is at the prime of sophistication in public but eats crumbs that fall into her cleavage when at home. I’m the girl who swears a lot while driving. Basically, I’m just your regular girl!

On usual days, I’m chirpy and fun-loving (except during work hours when my soul feels darker than the night sky) who cracks ridiculously lame jokes and is the only one who laughs at them. So, I’m a sweet girl. But that’s when I’m not on the road.

I think people could die just by the look I give them when they do something annoying on the road.

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It’s like I become an entirely different person when I’m behind the steering wheel. My each sentence consists of at least 5 swear words (well, only if the sentence is 5 words long in total). I think people could die just by the look I give them when they do something annoying on the road. And I think I’m actually going to pray for those people to rot in hell who start honking the second the signal turns green. It’s one of two things; I either become impulsively arrogant, extremely irritable and downright filthy when I’m driving or the people outside of my car become awfully stupid. Although, I strongly think it’s the latter because which sane person would run to cross the street exactly at the same time as they see my car heading.

So, the next time you use the phrase ‘female driver’ and try to laugh, keep me in mind.

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In a gist, yes! I abuse. A LOT! But only when I’m driving. So the next time you try to overtake me or cut my lane, know for sure that I will be gloriously abusing you and your entire existence in the confines of my car. And while we’re at it, let’s thank the lord for almost soundproof window-glasses!

So, the next time you use the phrase ‘female driver’ and try to laugh, keep me in mind and your urban dictionaries in front for I will use abuses even your forefathers won’t have heard of!

Love,

An innocent girl!

PS. Ever heard of something called an indicator?



Author: Zainab Haji

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