I have absolutely no idea how to react!

It was the most perfect proposal in the world. You had planned it in advance, hadn’t you? All because you thought that I deserved to feel extra special on this day. There were scented candles shaped as hearts giving out a delicate fragrance. My bedroom was decorated with roses, not just the red ones but also white, yellow and pink roses. You got down on one knee and told me in a voice brimming with emotion how much I meant to you, how much you loved me and how you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me.

It couldn’t have been any better. All your proposal needed in order to be perfect was you.

As clichéd as it sounds, it was me and not you who messed it all up. If someone as wonderful as you asks a girl to be his wife, saying that she’s lucky would be an understatement of the highest order. And I do believe that I am very fortunate to have you in my life. You make life bearable, you know.

But for some reason, my response to your heartfelt proposal was “Cool, dude!” followed by a double thumbs up.

In your presence, I got to be me, without any filters and without any holding back.

proposal 1

Awkward much? But then again, as you are well aware by now, that’s totally my style: weird, awkward and overall derpy. You can’t even complain because you fell in love with this crazy version of me! In your presence, I got complete acceptance to go all out and break out of my shell. In your presence, I got to be me, without any filters and without any holding back. How could I not fall in love with you?

You see, I do want to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you and I cannot imagine a future where you’re not around. Despite this, your proposal totally caught me off-guard!

I get that we have been dating each other for three years now, and that everything is going well. Your Mom loves me (we gossip over shots of vodka) and my Mom loves you (all those compliments about her food finally paid off!).

Marriage though? I don’t think we are ready for that just yet.

But, love, marriage isn’t the only thing we dreamt about, is it?

proposal 3

We met at a stage in our lives when we had a lot of growing up to do. And we grew up together with our hearts entwined in each other. Together, we dreamt of a life where we would wake up in each other’s arms every single morning. We would cook our meals together and fall asleep holding each other every night.

But, love, marriage isn’t the only thing we dreamt about, is it?

We haven’t done even half the things we had planned! I haven’t written a bestselling book yet, while you are yet to take the career leap into wildlife photography. We haven’t even ‘lived in sin’ yet! How will we do that if we get married? And you know, we really can’t depend on our goody-goody siblings to scandalise our parents! They are very unlikely to be in a live-in relationship.

Yes, life is about moving forward, but sometimes, we should just enjoy the current view. What I mean to say (minus the philosophy), is that life is treating us well right now, what’s the hurry in moving forward? Let’s sit down and enjoy what we have going on for us.

You know that we are going to spend our lives together. But that doesn’t just mean marriage, right?

Love,
Your hesitant fiancée



Author: Maitreyee Mhatre

 

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